Thursday, April 2, 2009

I'm having a rough moment in life.. It doesn't help if friends make me feels worst.

This morning when i wake up, my mother scolded me. My Psp suddenly switched itself off so i panicked last night. And when i woke up this morning, my mother was scolding me for not even caring for it. She keep saying alot of bad things about me. She keep saying if i keep this up, not caring for my things, she will leave me in singapore and go and marry the guy she met online in Cambodia...

What is wrong with this world... I feel so weary inside. I tried to watch youtube videos to take the mind off the pain of losing my bf and getting scolded daily by my mother.

I login msn. The first thing was leon. So i chatted with him i felt better. Then later, Reeves msn-ed me and asked me whether i was taking him for a ride or not. I was abit surprised about why he would say like that. He told me ppl contacted him for his guitar and keyboard lessons but failed to commit. Then he just went offline like this. I felt so sad inside. Why take it that i played a prank on u? I did what u wanted: i changed my msn title and asked if anyone wanted to take lessons and placed ur email there. If they changed their mind after talking to you, is it still my fault?

I was so frustrated i just told leon," what is wrong with u guys" and then he started swearing at me. He told me don't use a statement like this.. Like.. U u u.. I guess i was feeling rather down and just used "u" to mean males. Usually i use "u guys" to mean males only, no females involved. Cause most of the problems i have is from guys.

So now i'm sad. I'm down. Like when i was feeling so lonely and sad when my father passed away, i used to play Maplestory to get out of life. And now i'm using Cabal to get out of it again.

I wonder how long i can take this before i break down again.

Help.. someone.....


she told the story ... 8:36 AM


Monday, March 30, 2009

I guess he's happy now that he knows that i'm okay. It's good. At least he won't suffer with me..

Damm, i'm still hurting as usual. It always hurt unless i occupy myself with something. It's hard to keep up a lie. Just keep smiling and smiling then when he turns i collapse. Hah..

Hard for me to express myself nw.. So watch this video.. It's a song i connected to..



she told the story ... 10:20 AM



yooo hoooo!!!! I'm back muahahaha!!!

Wah, i haven't updated like so long hahas.Well, i did alot of things in these few weeks. I've been cabaling and going out with friends tooo.. wow..

I did mia a few days too, sry guys. Receiving counselling for my break up problem argh... It was tough man. And well, a few days of it was alright! And i think i'm altogether okay le... But the pain still twitches. But i feel better nw.. Lots better. I do yearn to love someone sigh.. It just sucks to be alone sometimes... Yea, well. I just nw wanted to chat with bruce lo.. Tell him how was it. Then unlucky, i can't find my phone WAHHH.. Siao sia.. I searched oso can't. I think ran out of battery. Call also never reply de.. =(( Sad!!!

So i asked Hanfeng help me pass message to bruce. course i got tell bruce where i going to for help. And then Hanfeng just ask me go and sms him myself.. Argh... Nvm lo.. Tml i tell him.

Oh ya. I'm too lazy to post pics so go to my FB and go look through all the pics of what i've been up to.. Yay, later i going Cabal again muahahas.. D:

Oh ya, just now got choir. Daryl and Jason so funny lo. I'm glad now our choir so lively now.

I think i'm considered blessed than most ppl already.. I should be grateful so i need to thank all my friends =D

Thanks most of all to Deb,Jay,shaSha,Bruce,Bryan kor,Long Fei,MAN,Lex'C,Ming Yang, my tenants, My mom, Luth kor, Reeve papa, Loon a.k.a Ex Mapler NightzAOG, Mei vonne a.k.a yumiko, The 3 Andys in my life: Wong,Tan,Cheong( Lmao Andy), Justin-Ah..(Justina), Xin yi aka Nicole, Qimin a.k.a Queen , the Choir Trio, Aisah for laughing despite everything. Faith for.. urhh faith?

No thanks to daddy Kang wei for asking me for the 5th time how me and my bf is doing.. Tell him so many times break le still can ask me same question RARRRR..

<333>

toodles, tml going out with Bryan kor...
Will upload peektures =D


she told the story ... 9:17 AM


Saturday, March 14, 2009

Argh, joshie and bennifer suddenly mia so on wed and thurs i was rotting at home. Anyways, i had choir ytd so i didn't come online..

However, this morning i checked my blog because i felt like blogging.. So my msn was on as usual and straight away my friends tell me about the tagboard issue. And then i read the latest one on Pwnster aka jordan.

To the immature person who decided to pose as Jordan: GET A LIFE!!!! Me and jordan were on the phone that day and he was helping me check my maple account. Whoever wants to stir problems GND pls.

Even my galfren is pissed with this matter.

Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:21 PM:
eh..ur tagboard very dramatic leh...
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:22 PM:
y dont u juz ban them frm tagging
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:22 PM:
making me so pissed off
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:22 PM:
cos got 1 of them say i m teaching u to not face reality
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:22 PM:
wth
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:22 PM:
so pissed
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:23 PM:
i wanna tag back but later ur tagboard will becum more dramatic again so i rather msn u
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:23 PM:
haha
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:23 PM:
and u spelt my name WRONGLY!!!!!!!
Jac sent 12/03/2009 11:23 PM:
haha

To alan: when hanfeng apologised on ur behalf, i took it. But why are u here to tag in a negative way again? Do u like creating problems?

Ok, i'm fking pissed le. I wanted to blog abt my awesome dinner with the choir yesterday but now i lost my passion for blogging.


she told the story ... 1:12 AM


Thursday, March 12, 2009

Oh man. I was actually kinda happy last night. UNTIL THE DRAMA STARTED. If u guys are wondering what happened pls read my previ0us post and the tagboard.

These few days have been hectic. Me and hanfeng are okay with each other as friends already but after all that drama i feel like i really need get out of life awhile.

To whoever zk or Hanfeng's friends pls. We solved the matter last night already. Why are u still commenting on my blog about last night matter? After talking to Jordan aka Pwnster i totally understand why he is frustrated.

Put urself in his shoes. He loves me for close to 4 years. But i don't love him at all. And he keeps getting angrier as he see me stead with one guy after another and everyone keep hurting me. I mean, as a guy, will u get upset to see ur love one cry every single night?

Pls stop this rubbish on my blog cause i'm fed up with this nonsence or i will delete my blog.

And hanfeng, i truly agree with u now that our friends are the main reason we break up.


she told the story ... 12:00 AM


Wednesday, March 11, 2009

I never knew why u yelled at me. You always said i was useless but even though u scream and shouted at me u always came back. 

Remember the first time, at bootes? I asked u how to get to Elinia in MapleStory. U told me to take vip cab and then u gave me 1k mesos. I ended up at Sleepywood thanks to u!!!! Hahas. U were my first ever bootes fren. Then i went over to Cass le but we still email each other. 

I nv mentioned u to anyone. I guess at first it was childish to say," hey i have a fren i met in MapleStory". Then slowly i chatted with Marcus, Jopie and then i forgot u le.

U still care for me right? I know u dun mean all those yellings. U used to smile always with that font hahaas. =) . F3 Maplestyle haha!! And u're always F2ing at me. u came over sometimes with that noob account to talk to me. 

What happened sia. 4 years ago. When i joined maple cause i was lonely. No one in school was really there. Sheryl was always talking to Krystal then all the class had Bffs. I wanted to clique so bad. U're scold me EVERYDAY. Cus i maple 12hrs per day. But i remember i bought another extra 2xp card later then u scold me even harder.

U're younger than me. but u're more mature than me wor. We were always miles apart. We don't mention each other to our frens. We were non-existant. Sometimes i think u're just a figment of my imagination. We just sneak talks now and then. What are we?

Don't get angry. I got myself into relationships. It should be my mistakes alone. But i dun wan u to punish me. I know i did it wrong. Don't scold me idiot or slut or anything pls. I'm not. I just wanted love and understanding. 

U always scold me but u loved me right? Sadly, we'll frens only. No more. Sry. I say i feel better but i still love him alot. I know it's foolish to keep holding on but i'm trying my best to get over him ok? Cheer up, like u always say. U can find a better guy. I say the same to u. U deserve someone else better nw ok? Stay Happy. 

I wun mention who u are bt it's obvious right.

Keep smiling always.


she told the story ... 10:19 AM



Monday:
Slacked the whole day. Was chatting with Daryl,Xiang Cai, Daddy( i got alot of daddies =/) and a couple of other ppl before my Choir. Hahas.. It was raining as usual lo... Everyday rain rain rain sigh.. It's getting so colddddd =(
Then later during choir we went through 2 songs: So Sick and I'm Yours. Hahas, Deborah loves the song i'm yours. Because of her i knew how to sing abit ( Thnx sweetie!)

Then later i went out with Bennifer to Clementi to eat @ Botak Jones. Ben took pics lo but until now haven send me yet ROAR.. Soo after that he send me home. Then i keep pleading him to poledance. Sadly there wasn't any nice poles he wanted to use so he'll be owing me a pole dance YAY!!!!

Then later kor kor bryan tell me bedtime story hahas. Soooo sweet of him.
Bryan. says:(1:11:12 AM)
Once there was a girl name Sarah.
Bryan . says: (1:11:13 AM)
she was the princess of astral.
Bryan . says: (1:11:18 AM)
astral = name of town..
Bryan . says: (1:11:37 AM)
but there was this evil wizard who wants to control the town.
Bryan . says: (1:12:12 AM)
as he was so evil, kidnapping the princess was the only way to make himself king. As he had tried alot of ways, like killing king but all failed.
Bryan . says: (1:12:34 AM)
so knowing that the princess visits the garden every friday morning.
Bryan . says: (1:12:54 AM)
he lied to the princess that there was another garden further out into town.
Bryan . says: (1:13:06 AM)
being in loved with flowers, she heeded his words.
Bryan . says: (1:13:37 AM)
upon reaching the so-called garden, she fell into a trap, and was kidnapped by the wizard.
Bryan . says: (1:13:54 AM)
to protect himself from the armies sent by the king,
Bryan . says: (1:14:03 AM)
he created a dragon pet for himself,
Bryan . says: (1:14:10 AM)
a BIG RED EVIL dragon.
Bryan . says: (1:14:24 AM)
the king's armies died one by one.
Bryan . says: (1:14:39 AM)
But, there was this knight, named bryan (HAHAHA).
Bryan . says: (1:14:57 AM)
he told the king that he alone would be able to save the princess.
Bryan . says: (1:15:06 AM)
thus, he went to the cave.
Bryan . says: (1:15:15 AM)
faced the dragon.
Bryan . says: (1:15:39 AM)
the dragon was huge and powerful, but to the knight's eye, it was nothing.
Bryan . says: (1:15:56 AM)
the knight and the dragon fought wildly.
Bryan . says: (1:16:06 AM)
untill the cave collaspe and killed the dragon !
Bryan . says: (1:16:17 AM)
then the wizard was kidnapped. and the princess was saved !
Bryan . says: (1:16:30 AM)
the town lived peacefully after ever.
Bryan . says: (1:16:31 AM)
ok
Bryan . says: (1:16:33 AM)
THE END
Bryan . says: (1:16:37 AM)
sorry. you're sleeping le
Bryan . says: (1:16:38 AM)
:D

Tues:

Went out with my awesome girlfriends: Doreen(a.k.a reen), Jacqueline(jac jac), Li Ling ( ling ling~) and Peck Si ( pepsi!). We ate at some sushi place at Cineleisure there. Quite nice the food.



After the meal peekture =)
Me and Jac Jac decorating the NeoPrints =)




Doreen and Jac Jac =)

Doreen satisfied with her decorations =)



Jac Jac hard at work.. Mistress Artist =D

Then after that we walked to Far East Plaza. Walk awhile then Doreen says she need to go home. Liling went with her =(. Then Jac left to go find her cousin. Sighhhhh. Later me and Pecksi went to watch slumdog millionaire. She never cry lo!!! Wah, i feel so emotional. I keep tearing hahas. Anyways hope to see u again my dears =) xoxo.

P.s i Love my gothic outfit eeeeeeee.

Wednesday.

Mafia Wars on Facebook whole day. Yay, 3 days lvl 28 le yes arh.. I'm a pro chiongster haha =(

I very sian login Tagged le. Sooo boring. All the tikopeh. Then Bennifer today suppose to go out with me in the end never contact me at all. =( Hope tomorrow i hang out with Tissue paper it will be better. Yay, tml going joshie house =) Last time we watch horror movies together then everytime i scream i bang my head on his metal thingy. *sniff*. Okay bah.. Will update again when i'm free.

I'm feeling better, and i don't think abt you that much anymore..

P.s How come my mother can get hair extensions and pay 300 dollars but doesn't want me to get a camera T_T''?


she told the story ... 3:36 AM


That Girl
SaRaH
~18 Years old
~Diploma in Chemical Processing(Singapore)
~Sp Choir


♡Loves
~ Donuts
~ cookies
~Singing
~Gothic Lolita fashion
~ & kisses


♡WISHES
~ A Camera =(
~ More Clothes =)
~ To learn japanese properly



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